MY
BEST-FRIEND CALLED MY GIRLFRIEND ‘EASY BUY’.
WHAT
SHOULD I DO?
Tell me make I know
now!!! If you sure me, make I know now!!! If you no…….. {Music by Chike playing}
Tari was
still singing along when the glass cup, full of palm wine fell to the ground,
shattering into pieces.
The moment I
heard the sound, I approached the scene from the bedroom, thinking it was the
new smart television I just bought the previous day before Tari visited me, for
two hundred and twenty two thousand naira.
Between the
room and parlour, I already had lots of thoughts all in connection to the sound
from the sitting room. I wanted a first-hand account of what happened, because
I no wan make Tari tell me story. My salary is seventy four thousand naira and
I had to buy that television from ‘easy buy’ so they can be deducting their
balance from my salary every month.
I was
already thinking out loud as I was getting out from the bed {I for kukuma buy
forty thousand naira television o, make e no be say na dat television fall o,
before I go pay for wetin I never use.. see wetin peer pressure dey cause,
everybody wan live fake life, na wa o, this life no balance at all. But if we
no do like this, the girls no go follow us na, them go feel say we no be tight
niggas]
Oh Tee baby,
as I styled her name... Careful make you no wound o. I said to her as she was
cleaning the floor. My mind was at rest as I saw my ‘easy buy’ television
intact.
This one you
branch Swapi market before you reach house like this, be like better dey o, because
anytime you dey sing this Chike song, na belle full - I dey belle full for the
end o, because the two food you dey give me dey sweet me well well.
“Didi, make
I finish from kitchen, you go enjoy the first food well well.” Tari said.
I just
nodded in affirmation as I took my seat to enjoy the new television I bought,
as I tuned the decoder to the opening ceremony of the 2020 Euros that was
kicking off.
Few minutes
into the game between Turkey and Italy, I perceived something like fresh fish
pepper soup. As I turned to look, my sense of smell wasn’t in doubt. It was
indeed fresh-fish pepper soup and rice.
If Turkey
like, make them win Italy, e no concern me. I wasted no time as I devoured the
delicious meal prepared by Tari.
“Tari come
make I show you something for room”, I said to my girlfriend, little did she
know I was eager to return the favour of the pepper soup and eat the second
food.
As we
entered the room, her phone rang the first time, we all ignored, it rang again,
we ignored as we were in the process of having the second meal. At the third
call, I took the phone to silent it. Just then, I noticed it was my friend Timi
who had been calling my girlfriend, and he never even mentioned to me that they
were communicating. I believe she forgot to mention to him that she was coming
to my house. I knew the number even as she saved his name as Bros….
She reluctantly
asked who was calling and I told her it was ‘Bros’, in shock, she said don’t
pick, only if she knew that I had my friends number in my head.
As I picked,
the first thing I heard was “baby where are you?”…..it was that moment I
remembered the song ‘Omoge mi - by Psquare’. I couldn’t even feel the pepper
soup in my stomach anymore. This was a girl I loved.
Could this
be the reason my friend Timi had been discouraging me that Tari was ‘easy buy’
and I should forget about her because he was also benefiting without my knowledge.
It’s already
past eight pm, and curfew had begun in my city, what should I do to my
girlfriend?
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